Back on July 2nd, we left Peyton behind with the grandparents and joined Gavin and Hazel for a 10 day whirlwind trip around Ireland. We by no means covered the whole island, but we did a fair amount of it. Our itinerary was a perfect balance of sight-seeing from the car window (the quality of which varied depending on your position in the car) and by foot. It was a remarkable journey that I will fondly remember forever.
I don't know how to process my emotions and feelings for the journey. For me there were so many. There are times in my life when I am quite willing and able to be sentimental and heart-felt, not to mention articulate, with my words. Maybe because I'm still processing the adventure, or maybe because too much time has past since we have returned, but I've yet to feel confident in my ability to retell the details.
What I do recall with clarity:
Planning and packing for Peyton to stay at two different homes while we were away was far more difficult and time consuming for me than packing for myself. The number of bags and stuff that Peyton would be taking with him far out numbered what we were taking for ourselves.
I was surprised (both good and bad) that Peyton shooed us out the door with very little emotion, like it was just another day, "Go, Mama. Dada, go." Although he did have a bit of a puzzled look on his face as he waved bye-bye from Grandma's arms. Of course he was going to be fine. He was with his grandparents, who he adores.
Being choked up as I was passing through security at the airport, surrounded by many families with kids, wishing I had Peyton with me for my own security, not to mention the fact that you get to bypass much of the security line when you travel with small children.
The liberating feeling of being childless and alone for 10 days and the feeling of guilt that haunted me for feeling so glad to be just that, free and alone.
Finishing a complete thought, sentence, conversation and attending to my own needs was glorious.
Enjoying the companionship of my husband in a new country.
Loving the time we had to enjoy the company of my brother and sister-in-law. They are wonderful people, who we admire and love.
Staying up late, with surprising ease (the time difference definitely in our favor at night), for the first time in, well probably forever. I'm not a night person. Yet, struggling to wake and get moving in the morning (time difference definitely not working with us at this point)!
Never quite getting used to the view from the left side of the road.
Finding a bit of myself that has been lost or forgotten for some time.
Feeling a sense of awareness and connection to the world outside my own bubble - it isn't so big after all, but also feeling so small, like one of millions.
Shock and awe every day that I woke up and realized that I really and truly was in Ireland.
Stunned by the beauty of the island and the people I was with.
Elation upon my return to home and to be reunited with my son.
Warning - There are lots of photos here. And this is the pared down version. Take a peek:
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