Friday Funnies

Since it is Friday, I thought I might provide a little Friday humor.  Over the past few months there have been plenty of debates initiated, declarations made, discussions at large and defiant behavior from our Little Dude.  He's inquisitive, and exceptionally witty.  He's intense, serious, focused, but also easy going and good natured.  I find much of each day to be challenging, irritating, frustrating, overwhelming, and thankfully quite funny and memorable.  Here are a few more of my favorite Peyton quotes.

June 2: (After sharing with me an elaborate plan to play on the beach with Grama)
Me:  Grama is fun to play with.
P:  I like Grama more than I like you.  [Very matter of fact].

June 1-(At breakfast. Discussing Grampa's muffins with Steve)
P: Maybe I can be a muffin man when I grow up instead of a builder?

June 27-(Dinner table upon seeing orzo, which is pasta and he does love.)
P:  I hate this dinner! Make me some pasta!
Me:  Ok.  You may get down from the table and go to your room. (This actually worked and a few minutes later he rejoined us, ate his entire plate and declared it delicious.  Victory!)

June 27-(Overheard-To Aunt Mollie)
P:  Aren't I a lovely boy?

June 18-(In the car)
P: The big people make the plans.  The little people make the choices.  So we make the plan.  Allison makes the choices.

June 8-(Late afternoon waiting for Daddy to come home)
P: Hey, did you talk to Steve? (Yes, he sometimes refers to us by our first names!)

June 6-(Just hanging around the house)
P: Mommy, is sister going to have a baby someday when she grows up to be a big girl?
Me:  She might.  I would like that.  But only she gets to decide that, with her partner.
P:  I want to be her partner.
Me:  Do you?  You want to marry her?
P: Yeah!  I want to marry her!

June 5-(After a nap that didn't happen)
Me:  No napping today?
P:  No, Mommy, cuz I'm too playful to nap.

Date unknown-(seemingly out of the blue)
P: I don't like Mommy.  My mommy is mean and scary.
Me: (Surprised) Me?  I'm mean and scary?
P: Yes.
Me: What's mean and scary?
P:  Your face.  Your face is mean and scary.

May 21-(At the dinner table, peering curiously at the chunks of meat (lamb) on his dinner plate)
P:  Do we eat lamb?
Me:  Uh-huh.
P: But, why?
Me:  Because it's good protein and tastes yummy.
P:  But sometimes it's black and sometimes it's white.
Me: (not sure I like where this conversation is going...) Yeah, their fur is sometimes black and sometimes white.
[Big sigh.  End of conversation, I think.]
P: (After dinner, to Daddy, who did not hear the previous conversation) Are there still lambs at the farm?
Daddy:  No.  We ate them all!
[Concerned look.  Then laughs.]

May 18-(Before bed time)
P: In the night I hide my penis with a diaper and jammies and other clothes to protect it from insects and other creatures.

May 9-(At my workout, to my personal trainer)
P:  Mommy has to work harder so she can be strong like Grandma.  See my muscles.  I'm as strong as Grandma.

May 9- (On our bike ride-he suddenly stops)
P: I have a big meeting tonight with Froggy and I'm SO tired.

April 28-(Car ride home from the park)
Me:  Did you like playing at LBA park?
P:  Yeah, it was ok, but I think it should be called ABCD park.

April 23-(Peyton and I had a talk about the brain)
P: [Later that day]  Hold on, Brain!  Mommy, my brain is telling me I have to poop, but I have a couple more pieces to do [of his puzzle].  So, I told it to wait.

April 18-(Peyton's response to our discussion about Spanish class where I told him it was a class to learn how to speak a different language)
P: But Mommy, I don't want them to change my voice!

April 11-P: [Long, exaggerated, fake laugh] That was my biggest laugh ever!

March 14-(The morning after a random fever the night before)
P: While I was sleeping the sickness just flew away!